Psychological Roots of Shame and Blame

To have a large body used to mean something. If you were a man, it implied that you possessed the power to take what you wanted. If you were a woman, it meant that your father or husband could afford to not only basically nourish, but to indulge you.
On the human scale of such matters, in the depths of the preverbal mind, there is a lot more justification for overweight people to look scornfully at normal-weight people than vice versa. It’s just so glaringly obvious (in the absence of actual logic, of course) that the overfed specimen is superior to the less bulky kind.
But with modern, logical knowledge, there is no valid reason to be proud of fat. The urge to brag about the size of the belly has been displaced. So, instead of showing off the obvious result of privileged eating — the expanded waistline — it is now necessary instead to show off how you got that way. The primitive urge to be admired for our sheer poundage is displaced by the urge to be admired for where, how, and what we eat.
Obsession leads to… more obsession
Currently, to be observed dining in an absurdly expensive restaurant is something that insecure people do in the hope that they will consequently feel better about themselves. To engineer a situation where both your financial peers and the less privileged commoners watch you eat overpriced food becomes the most significant event of the day.
Meanwhile, within someone with a differently attuned conscience, lives the awareness that impoverished people are more likely to be obese because of gnarly food additives, low availability of healthful fresh foods, unaffordable medical care, fewer opportunities to enjoy safe outdoor exercise or to afford home gym equipment, and other factors.
If a conscientious critic has a choice between mentally persecuting the wealthy obese or the poor obese, resentment toward the overfed will be much easier to justify and reconcile with a finely-tuned sense of basic morality.
Historical echoes
Whether intellectually defensible or not, the attitude itself is basically instinctive. To look at an overweight person is to trigger a very deep concept that the mind does not even need to translate into words, but to which it automatically leaps: If that person has access to enough food to fatten them up like that, it must be because they intentionally, knowingly, and wrongly deprived someone else.
That assumption, arrived at by the subconscious mind of a well-to-do person, might be right or wrong. They might be recognizing a fellow piratical spirit, but they also might be totally off the mark. Likewise, a penniless individual could also be either sadly correct, or unfairly 180 degrees wrong, about the stout person.
Or, at the sight of an individual who looks pretty darn good, the onlooker might assume that he or she goes to great lengths to keep that body in presentable shape — and might be correct. Or, it could simply be the case that the fine-looking object of their gaze was lucky enough to inherit incredible genes.
A pitiful waste of mental energy
The point here is, for multiple reasons it would be much more sane and healthy for us to not think about other people’s bodies at all. First, because our subconscious minds are capable of reaching erroneous conclusions all day long, and second, because we are totally able to believe bounteous amounts of nonsense without even being aware of this flaw.
But mainly, regarding the condition another person is in, all that mental energy is simply wasted because our theories and opinions will not affect that shape at all. And how does this relate to the psychology of blame and shame?
Suppose that someone gives up the chance to run a lucrative family business in order to rescue cats that might otherwise be “put to sleep.” In the public eye, this person might be considered saintly, and spoken of in complimentary terms, and admired for the strength of his or her convictions, and for his or her refusal to bend before public opinion.
Now, suppose that a different person could have captured a top-level position in a powerful company — but sadly, during the immediate post-graduate year of corporate ladder-climbing, she gained 80 pounds. She could have prevented that from happening — but did not. She ignored public opinion, refused to bend to any sort of pressure, and just got fat, and lost the chance to climb the corporate ladder. Strangely enough, to resist the reasons and rules of others — in that situation — is not admired one little bit.
Our minds versus reality
It is totally possible that additional studies could discover other factors that affect and are affected by the relationship between obesity and income. Many other interesting truths might be discovered, too. But the bottom line is, why bother? Unless we happen to be a person working toward an advanced degree in a specialized academic field, there is really no reason at all for us to expend mental energy on these matters.
Few things in life are more futile than wasting even a moment’s thought on the shape that anyone is in, other than 1. ourselves and 2. the minor children for whose health we are legally and morally responsible. To grasp this principle is to free up countless brain cells for more productive and satisfying use.
Your responses and feedback are welcome!
Source: “Income and obesity: what is the direction of the relationship?,” BMJ.com, January 2018
Image by joenomias/Pixabay









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